During the years 1990-1994 I bought a total of 8 Nirvana CDs. Three of those were the Nevermind album, because the first one I lost in Detroit, and the second one became too scratched to play. I’d like to think that at the very least I bought him that shotgun shell.
Six-Degrees
June 6th, 2009Ask the Puppet
June 3rd, 2009These are what I could salvage from the old site. Again, these are ancient. The Puppet is preparing for his comeback tour/advice column. Prepare. – Arthur
| Q. | Horny Asks Dear Puppet, There is a girl interested in me right now that only wants my money. How do I maximize pussy output and minimize the money I spend on her. |
| A. | The Puppet Replies… GHB n. abbr. Gamma Hydroxy Butyrate 1. Gamma Hydroxybutyrate, a colorless and odorless drug used illicitly for “recreational” purposes and for “date rape.” 2. A central nervous system depressant. It tends therefore to increase sociability and function as something of a transient antidepressant. |
| Q. | Care Bear Asks Dear Puppet, Do flea collars really work? |
| A. | The Puppet Replies… No, safe responsible sex is the only tried and true method. Have your partner tested every six months. |
| Q. | Ridener Asks Dear Puppet, Thank you for doing so much to educate people reguarding God’s law. I have learned a great deal from you, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. I do need some advice from you, however , reguarding some other specific Biblical laws and how to follow them. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can’t I own Canadians. |
| A. | The Puppet Replies… I would go several steps further and say that townships, commercially zoned areas, and zip codes would count as nation-states as well. There should be no distinction as far as Canadians or Mexicans as slaves go, as both are equally worthless. |
| Q. | Brian Asks Dear Puppet, did tuna kill jesus christ? |
| A. | The Puppet Replies… No, the Jews did. |
Good Luck
May 31st, 2009In case something good ever happens to me,
I should learn the “Neposian Dance of Joy”.
Be prepared I always say.
Are You Growing A Beard?
May 31st, 2009No
I’m just too lazy to shave
Thank you.
What Stopped Me?
May 31st, 2009You dont even know how close to death you came
You were looking at that chicks ass
And telling me you’d like to fuck her
I almost beat you to death with a fucking miniblind
Miss Frizzle
May 31st, 2009Miss Frizzle from “The Magic Schoolbus” is hot.
I can’t explain it.
Just watch the episode where she teaches the kids,
About why chickens lay eggs.
And you’ll understand.